Santa’s New B-52


With half of Santa’s reindeer out with Covid and the remaining team not able to pull a sleigh full of presents, nor Santa’s increased size due to his stress eating Mrs. Claus’s holiday cookies, Christmas was on the brink of cancellation this year!

In order to save Christmas, the Minot AFB in North Dakota stepped up offering Santa Claus the use of their B-52 Bomber, “Wise Guy” - the latest B-52 Bomber returned to service this past March.

Though not nearly as sophisticated as Santa’s sleigh, the B-52 will be a dependable delivery vehicle capable of flying through even the worst conditions this Christmas Eve. With a payload of 70,000 pounds, a range of 8,800 statute miles, and eight Pratt & Whitney engines having a maximum speed of 650 mph, the B-52 bomber will be equal to the task. Additionally, the advanced targeting and image processing technology spliced directly into Santa’s “Naughty List” data base allows for trouble-free locating of all houses belonging to good little boys and girls across the globe.



Wishing you and yours the merriest of Christmases and happiest of New Years ahead.


~ Marianne

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